This week: PHOENIX
So the comic book crossover is a fairly standard device at this point, where the brilliant minds behind the industry come up with some amazing story that’s so important that it brings together characters from several different titles. REALLY, what crossovers are about is money. Because if I write a story that features 10 different characters that each have their own book, now you as the reader have to buy ALL TEN BOOKS in order to get the whole story. Guaranteed sales!
Sometimes crossovers are awesome, sometimes they are super lame, but in the case of Marvel’s most recent event, Avengers vs. X-Men, I don’t really care how it turns out. Because (I’m fairly certain) the result of this crossover is the one thing I’ve been waiting for several years now… the return of the Phoenix.
The Phoenix, aka Jean Grey, is a staple character in the X-Men’s cannon. In short, she was a mutant, born with the special powers of telepathy and telekinesis, and was a founding member of the X-Men. From there, depending on who’s telling the story, she was physically photocopied and replaced by a cosmic entity called the Phoenix Force, which basically got drunk on human emotions, went crazy, blew up a planet with 5 billion people on it, and then committed suicide. Then, SURPRISE, it’s revealed Phoenix wasn’t actually Jean (coughretconcouch), so she was allowed to come back to the living. Over time though, her powers (and awesomeness) continued to grow until she finally became the Phoenix for real. And then she was swiftly murdered by the Magneto-that-wasn’t-Magneto (coughcoughworstretconeveromgwhydotheyhateuscoughcough). So now she’s dead and everyone’s moved on, only no one has moved on because Jean Grey was literally (figuratively) the Queen of all Mutants, and no one (especially that dick Cyclops) can go more than a week without some sort of reference to her, a matter not helped by the presence of her daughter and this chick, who’s… a clone? A reincarnation? I dunno. Suppose we’ll find that out in a couple months when the crossover concludes.
So what makes the Phoenix so badass? Well, there’s the brain crushing telepathy. Jean Grey was already one of the most powerful telepaths around (described several times as the second most powerful mind on the planet, after Professor Xavier), and the Phoenix just took all that and amped it up. Then, there’s the unfathomable telekinetic abilities. Rearranging molecules? Turning trees into gold? Flying through space unaided? I mean, when was the last time you transported yourself and five of your closest friends onto a moving spaceship? Pyrokinesis, energy manipulation… this chick can do it all. But at the end of the day, the giant honking firebird just beats all.
Color coding is vital where the Phoenix is concerned. Green means Jean’s in charge. Jean is a perfectly sane, rational, compassionate young woman who’s got nothing but love for (almost) everyone. Red means “that bitch is crazy” and will likely peel you layer by layer. No, really. White, the newest addition, means Jean has finally transitioned into the goddess that she is. She super mellow, kind of like being high on cosmic weed. And then there’s Famke, who (through no fault of her own) is the color of suck, as the worst adaptation/depiction of the Phoenix. Ever.
Ever.
THIS is how you rep the Dark Phoenix, fools.
So Avengers vs. X-Men is on sale now, and Marvel’s Mightiest Mutants are battling Marvel’s Mightiest Heroes to determine the fate of Hope Summers (potential clone child mentioned earlier), who is most definitely the target of the Phoenix Force, headed straight for earth. She’s potentially the harbinger of doom for planet Earth (so you could see why Captain America might be concerned), but she’s also slated to be the savior of mutant kind (called the Mutant Messiah, even), which is why the X-Men are pretty pissed about the idea of letting her get captured/killed. Like with Marvel’s other recent big crossover, they’re asking fans to choose a side. Not that it needs to be stated, but THIS blog is Team X-Men, all day long.
chroniclesofamisfit 
